So many people feel stuck. I have been there myself, you feel empty, like every day is a repeat of yesterday. You want to change your situation but don’t know how. But the mistake that most people make is believing that for their life to change, a big change is needed. Whether that is a lump sum of money, or a relationship, a new job, new car, new house, or a revolutionary business idea. If only people would realise how wrong this approach is before it is too late.

In a society riddled with fast dopamine overload and quick money, we have lost touch with what it is to truly live. The reason you feel stuck is because you have been a prisoner to your bad habits. Day in day out you indulge in the same destructive behaviours, and the effects have compounded, leading you to the position you currently sit in. You feel stuck, you’re in a rut, you’re in a hole. This concept is not a new one, it is shared by billions across the world. It is only fair that the way up, is kind of the same as the way down. That is, replace bad habits with good habits, and then let time do its thing. As someone who has somewhat unstuck himself multiple times, I will try shift your perspective a little, and give you some inspiration to maybe get out of the mud.

The difficulty of self help is magnified if you have kids or you’re currently terminally ill or homeless, but it is still doable. If you’re not any of these things, if you’re a young person living in a developed country with money to eat and access to the internet, there are no excuses. Nothing external can fill the void we have internally, you must change your mindset, and your habits. Do not attach yourself to fleeting things, attach yourself to things no one can take away from you. These are your dreams and aspirations, your values, your kindness, your health.

Essentially and recently, I don’t care about much anymore if I can exercise every day and if my family is healthy. Everything else will sort itself out usually. I attribute this mindset I achieved to be nothing more than a by-product of the human experience and taking this world for what it is. My best advice to someone feeling stuck is to make small positive changes to their day, every day for an extended period, and see how quickly life gets better.

The first step is done, you have identified you don’t like how you feel, that is an indication that change is needed. The next step is to write down what you want to achieve. If it was me a year ago for example, my main goal was to get into the engineering industry in some capacity. After I graduated years ago, finding my first grad role proved to be the hardest thing I had ever done, and I thought the degree itself was enough of a challenge completed already. Approximately 300 rejections and 50 interviews later, I got a job, and looking back the process was more enjoyable than this view of Sydney city. Working 2-3 odd jobs at a time, doing interviews in new places, internships, traveling, having lunch alone in my car and meeting loads of different people. It was a journey, and I lived it fully. It truly was life personified in all its ups and downs.

The second step after identifying your main goals, is to read more. Absorb knowledge in every possible way, read self-help books, read emotional intelligence books, expand your brain daily. Even a note on the floor, pick it up and read it. The third step is waking up earlier. If you don’t work night shifts, waking up early is the single most critical step in the process to overcoming yourself. There is no logical reason to wake up 10 minutes before university or work, you’re selling yourself short. Use those hours in the morning to exercise, write goals, read, clear your mind, and boost your day. Waking up early ensures you’re on time to everything and will put you to bed early and give your days much more meaning and structure.

Once you begin to achieve these positive habits, and incorporate them slowly into your day, dropping your old ways becomes easy. Your bad habits will begin to feel like you’re letting yourself down. Whether it is video game addiction, social media doom scrolling, junk food, skipping the gym, Netflix binging, all of it will start to fizzle out.

The final step is probably the easiest and hardest step combined. That is a shift in perspective. You must view setbacks and failures as steppingstones and growth. Every failure is a lesson, you may not see it now, but it will all make sense in the future.  And enjoy the highs of success when they come, but don’t attach your worth to them. You are worthy regardless. Know that everything is limited, people, places, titles, it doesn’t go to the grave with you. Don’t be that person that is forced into a perspective shift by the death of a family member or by sickness. Do it yourself. Leave a legacy of positivity and someone remembered for uplifting others.

Tomorrow isn’t guaranteed, so stop feeling stuck and self-sabotaging. Expand your vision, let go of the past, we’ve all made mistakes. Set realistic expectations, put energy into yourself, love yourself and don’t fear uncertainty. Take breaks often, travel, live, talk to random people. Dive headfirst into good habits daily and your life will change before you know it. The reason human beings love complacency is fear, we fear what we are capable of, we fear success, we fear change. Tap into that mind and soul of yours that yearns for meaning, and just send it.

All the best. Stay blessed.

Houssam